Im really-really sorry.

I had applied to the "last wish foundation" that i want to be with you before you go, but they say im not dying enough to qualified, but i had told them that im "dying" to meet you before you go. Still, i will die slowly as each and every second i spend knowing that the only person that i had really-really talked to everynight has left, thousands of miles away. Im tryning to look at it a glass half full eventhough i know its empty. Im happy that u left for a better future though ;) GO OUT THERE...have fun, enjoy everything there, go out but makesure you do well in your studies..Remember....Its not easy to get you there, mummy do everything she could to send you there...Make her proud. =) I love you apple pie. Have a safe journey there. i promise ill blog summore. =*

Alaways and Always,

"The" Wedding. =)

"http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=116298655095432&ref=mf"

Something is wrong

Sometimes i felt that something is not right, but i never seems to know what. I felt agitated all d time, my friend says im being a girl, so its just a phase and its normal to have mood swings. well HAHAHA, seriously its not funny. Everything i did seems never right, i prefer to be alone rather then go out and enjoy eventhough its Hari Raya. I feel like im missing something, i wonder what is it.? Usually during Hari Raya eve the smell of cooked rendang and lemang use to linger arround the house. My little sister running arround the house refusing to go to bedcoz tomorrow raya d. The next morning i would salam my parents and seek for forgiveness. Tears would run from my moms eyes and she would hug each and everyone of us telling shes forgive us and she apologize for what she did to, and that is the only time i got to hug my dad. I guess i miss all of that. Its not all about raya sayang. I feel that ive started to loose everything in my life, no more raya, u will b going to UK soon, all of my closest friends seems slowly forgetting me, my dad selling off the car =P (which i dont mind since you going so i might not gonna jalan-jalan like i used to) i guess life is getting tougher and tougher for me. I really hope all of this is worth the sacrifice because i cant afford to loose anything anymore, especially u missy, dont u migrate to UK and leave me here. IM WAITING FOR YOU, come back as soon as u're done sayang. =)

Thats all for now,
I promise ill blog again soon.
Always and Always,

The Day You Left.

My dearest,

You left two days ago to continue your term at the academy and I'm slowly adapting to you not being around me. I miss you so much. You've made me very happy this past holiday that you came home. The birthday surprise, the movies we've watched, the time we spent together and the flowers that you surprised me with. I love every single bit of it.

I've not been feeling very well these few days. Headaches, nose block, sore throat and cough. Sigh. The best part was my headache only occurs on the left part of my head. Hmm, and as you know, I'm back at Penang. No plans whatsoever yet but my dad told me that we'd go get some clothes to be used at UK during the winter and he'd be bringing me to 'Tao' a restaurant here as they're having A'la Carte buffet. My stepmum told my dad to bring me only because they entire family can't eat so much so it would be a waste of money if they were to go, so yea. Buffet here I come. =p My dad told me that they have Abalone, sharksfin, oysters and etc. Yum, yum.... =p

Baby, I hope you'd do well in your studies to make your parents and I proud of you. And like you say, it's for a better future. Use it as a motivation for you to do well ok baby? And always remember, I love you. I love you. I love you.

Brother without the "r"

Hey gorgeous,
Even how long we postpone my flight back, i know we will never have enough time to catch up after 4 years being apart.
I still think that its not fair that god only gave us such little time to spend together before you have to go.
Honestly in my heart i always have the feeling that you will not pursue your studies to London.
From time to time i always tell myself that you will not go.
It makes me feel safe, calm, and happy knowing that you will be here.
Eventhough i know in my mind you are going in few months time.
Im happy that you are pursuing your dreams, i know you always wanted to go there.
Seeing you happy somehow makes me feel happy too.
=) your smile always puts a smile on my face*
Plus what makes it evenmore worst is at d time you're coming back i will not be here but instead ill be doing my practical for a year.
Total up, it would be 2 years we'll be apart.
As what we had our little talk bout our long distance relationship, always keep in touch no matter what.
E-mails, Skype, I.M's, FB, and especially blogging.
Its all gonna be okay right.?
=*
Hopefully the memories of this 8 months 1 week and 1 day can last for another 2years.
My 1st call after 4 years,
Our 1st date at one utama,
The day i pop the question, =P
Our fav food, MEATBALLS*
Tons of movies that we had watched,
Dinner,
Ur Christmas present,
My 1st time ever buying flowers,
Everything in that 8 months 1 week and 1 day really means alot to me darling.
And i know no matter what i wont 4get any of it and i hope u wont too.
I want you to know that im really-really-really happy with you.
I love you more than u could ever think of.

Thats all for now....ill blog more again k.
Promise*

Always and Always love you.